Bad trip

I’ve been trying to write this post for a while, but I don’t know how to write about something that I don’t even know is real or not. Whatever it is or is not, it is happening to me right now. It is a part of my life and therefore I can write about it. Write?

Me and the boyfriend got high together recently, it was all good fun until I had a bad trip and my come-down suddenly smacked me all the way down. During the trip, I saw myself disappearing in fragments, like a dandelion. I remember thinking, “is this how I go?” And then the high was over.

I’ve recently been told I may or may not have CIN-2 (in a nut shell), that is, pre-cancerous cells in my cervix. May or may not, because no doctor has the time for me. The whole experience, from the day I got referred to gynaecology, has been exhausting. Doctors are sticking their head between my legs and sticking their instruments in places where they do not belong.

Meanwhile, I’m trying to tell my family as much as possible without telling them anything about my sex life! My family of medical professionals…

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